Digital Voices

Listen to Alex’s speech here

I never believed the words” I love you” when I was younger. I wonder why I never understood the words “I love you” they were told to me. But then my thinking changed when my dad would say “I love you” to my mom. What is the word I love you, I thought to myself. Well when I was little my mom and dad obviously loved one another. They proved that by getting married and they were marred for 14 years until they got a divorces, This showed me that love must not be real to them, so what was love? I wondered, should I not love? I thought to myself, was love a bad thing to have.

So when I was in 7th grade I met this kid named Kyle. I thought he was nice and charming. So I hung out with him and I got to know him. We both liked to do the same things. We liked to go snowboarding, and to the moves. I liked hanging out with him, I had so much fun. I thought to myself, is this love or what? Or is this a stage that a girl in 7th grade girl goes through, what was it? When we went out one night to the movies he said that he loved me and that made me feel like I was special, so I said it back. After three more weeks we went snowboarding and we went on all the hills. But when it got close to dark I let him go off on the hill with some friends. I was happy that I was having fun with him, I guessed that I really loved him because I was happy. My friend Heather and I went on the hill that he went on to see if he was going to do a trick, but what I saw was him kissing another girl. I think he did it just because I was not ready to kiss him but it hurt me. It was not love, love is not real, I thought in my head. If that was love Kyle would not do that to you, also the word I love should mean they love you with all their heart. also you should not say I love you if you don’t mean it. I went home crying to my mom. She told me that he was not worth it, What I thought was the end of all love for me so that meant that I never wanted to date a boy again. For him being the first boy that I liked and not some kindergarten crush, I really thought that I loved him..

Well I went on throughout my life and I had friends with boyfriends and it didn’t bother me at all, not even when my mom met this guy named Matt. Matt was my mom’s boyfriend. I was glad that she met someone because after my mom and dad divorcesd it made her pretty sad until Matt came. I still didn’t believe in love. When someone asked me out I’d say “no”. My mom felt pretty bad for me and told me that I will have to give another try, but I didn’t want to.

Last year in 8th grade it felt great to go to a school where you are the bigger kid in the school. I thought that it would be fun. I would go to all the home football games that they had, and I did.
It got exciting? when this kid all of sudden just came out of nowhere and started to hang out, it kind of sacred me until I found out he ? he was my friend that I knew from the bus. I asked him why he was hanging out with me. He told me that he liked me. I thought wow that’s “cool because I liked him to so that was kind of great that he liked me but when he asked me out, I kind of stopped and had nothing to say. I didn’t know what to say, so many things where going through my head. I just didn’t know what to tell him and all of a sudden the word ”yes’’ came out of my mouth. It was the greatest day of my life I thought.

Cameron and I are still dating today and we have been for at least a year and 7 months. We have so much fun together. We go snowboarding and to the movies, just about every thing we do is fun. So I do believe in love, BUT does it last forever? When I say this I mean that love is out there and it will come, but let it take it time, I still have to.