Carley’s podcast
Carley’s “This I Believe” podcast
All Season Friends
by Carley
Everyday, I am surrounded by the people that I choose to be around. These people are called my “friends”. My “friends” are the people I hang out with on the weekend, and the people I call when I need to talk. But over the last couple of years, I have started to look at my “friends” in a different light. I realized that not all of my friends were there when I needed them, or only wanted to talk, when they wanted to talk about themselves. These friends are conditional friends, and because of these types of friends I have realized that they are not the type of friends I want. This is why I now believe in the value of all-season friends.
Conditional friends may seem like they are your best friend, especially when you first start the relationship. But these people are a lot different then the people you see as real friends. They are only there for you through the good times. Conditional friends like to talk about themselves, and as soon as you start to talk about your problems, they make it into their own. When you are in a tough situation, they will save themselves, before they ever try to defend you. They could stop being friends with you at anytime, for any reason, and it wouldn’t be a big deal. But don’t worry; I have noticed this type of “friend” will only stick around for a short amount of time, and then they will move on and find someone else they can use.
All-season friends are the opposite of conditional friends. They will be there for you, no matter what. They will listen to your problems, and if you are a true friend, you will listen to theirs. When you are arguing with someone else, they will stick up for you no matter what. Also, through good and bad, they will stand by your side and support you. But the most important thing is, true friends will also be your friend, even if you don’t spend all your time with them. They are the person you know you can call when you are upset, and they will always have their shoulder for you to cry on.
About Carley:
Carley is a senior at Charlotte High School. She is involved in many activities, and is excited to go to Michigan State University this fall. Leaving her home town, and starting her own life somewhere else, will present many new opportunities.
March 28th, 2007 at 7:42 am
Carley: you are so correct about all season friends. It is so good that you realize this early in life. You sound like a very perceptive young woman.
Loved your story!
March 28th, 2007 at 7:54 am
I’ve really appreciated the chance to hear/read the essays posted so far by Carley, Jack, & Mrs. Reed. You-all are great writers!
I was thinking across these essays and sort of connecting them in my early-morning brainfog. Your work reminded me of some small things–small risks, I guess–that paid off big over the long term. Two of the most important people in my life, people I would call friends for all seasons (my husband and one of my best friends), are people that I met because one of us took the little risk of going up to say hello and make conversation with a stranger. And in both cases, the other person also had to take a risk by working to make a second contact and start up the beginnings of an actual relationship. That’s a good reminder for me. Thanks for your wise words, and keep writing and speaking out! –Leah
March 28th, 2007 at 11:10 am
Carley,
Loved your piece. I love that our “All Seasons” type of friends are grown and cultivated and I’m glad that your teacher is one that I would consider in this category. Another great thing about “All Season Friends” is that, as you collect them through out your life, each of them adds their distinctive mark to your life, making it richer and fuller, and making you stronger.
March 29th, 2007 at 2:19 pm
carley,
i really liked your speech, it was interesting and really true. you have a good speaking voice, you make your speeches the same way you talk, it was very good.
March 29th, 2007 at 2:32 pm
Carley,
I loved your piece. Especially because I can relate to it greatly. This year has been a huge learning experience friends-wise. I thought that someone was my best friend, only to find out that she was jealous, and greedy, and downright mean. I gave up other friends because I thought that she “needed” me because she was going through a hard time. It took me getting out of the situation to realize that she was manipulating me and using me. I realized that sometimes it takes a really crappy situation to find out who your true friends are, and I certainly found out. I really liked your essay. Nice job.
March 29th, 2007 at 6:53 pm
I highly agree. I no longer have “conditional friends” and know who are true to you or not is the one thing that should matter.
March 26th, 2008 at 1:55 pm
I can really relate to this essay. It’s true on so many levels. Until recently, I had a lot of conditional friends, and this essay reminded me of what I went through.